Do As I Say And Not As I Do

For my regular reader’s I will first address the elephant in the room, the question of our bathroom renovation which, in my last ramble you may remember that I told you, the commencement of the two week project had been delayed by three weeks, with a new commencement date of 30th June, well that has been pushed back further, by another week, to a new start date of 7th July 🤷‍♂️ Although the owner of the firm did actually phone us this time to inform us, rather than just sending us an Email, and other than his profuse apologies, which did seem sincere enough, he has ‘verbally’ guaranteed that the work will not be delayed again beyond that new start date, although I won’t be convinced until the contractor’s actually arrive at my front door 🙄

Now apart from that, and to be completely open and honest with you, on a purely personal note, there has been very little of any real significance to write about, simply because, apart from the essential normal domestic type chores, we have not been doing very much at all. There has of course been other ‘stuff’ going on, both here in our own immediate local area of Spain, and also much wider afield in this world of our’s, although with the latter you will probably be more aware of all of that for yourselves, from the International media channels, as I only tend to focus these days on the media articles that have any direct impact on, or interest to, ourselves 🤷‍♂️ However, on saying that, yes Shazza does have a tendency to maintain her interest on what is going on in the much wider world and, rather irritatingly, insists on keep telling me about them, wether I want to hear about them or not 🙄 I have of course had year’s of practice of learning when to nod, or make some sort of verbal noise, at the right time, just so that she thinks I am listening to her 🤭

Before I get into my more usual ramblings though, let me just tell you that Shazza and I have managed to find the odd couple of minutes, in our less than hectic current lethargic lifestyle, to make a decision, well okay, Shazza made the decision and I just went along with it which, as you already know, is quite the normal way of doing things in our household. Yes, she has decided that ‘she’ needs a holiday, a proper holiday, one which involves driving to Malaga Airport, boarding a flight to somewhere that we cannot travel to in our car, and of course, once there, staying in one of our favourite ‘All Inclusive’ Hotel Chains. Fortunately, the relatively shortish flight will not involve flying through, or over, any ‘High Risk’ zones, where I am now led to believe that, in addition to all the usual on-board pre-flight safety briefings and information, like locations of escape exits, how to use the ‘Life Jackets’ and ‘Oxygen Masks’, just in case of any in-flight Emergency situations, but now, if you are on a route flying over some certain ‘High Risk’ areas, you are given extra instructions and demonstrations on the use and fitting of some additional ‘mandatory safety equipment’, notably a ‘Hard Steel Helmet’ and ‘Nuclear, Biological and Chemical (NBC) Protection Suits’ and, if you land somewhere, other than the scheduled destination, and are taken to less savoury holiday accommodations, you are instructed to only provide your ‘Surname and Passport Number’ to your new hosts, no matter how many ‘incentives’ they may try to bestow upon you to reveal more 😲 But the good news is that this additional information, and demonstration of how to use such equipment, will not delay the flight’s take off times, although, weaving through incoming weaponised drones or nuclear missiles may of course potentially delay your arrival time a little 😂

As you also well know by now, ‘we’ never appear to be able to do anything that is straightforward or simple, no, not us 🙄 I of course blame Shazza, for it was her that stipulated that she did not want to go on a holiday whilst the ‘Little Darlings’ were still off school and, whilst most UK ‘Little Darlings’ return to school at the start of September, the Spanish do not return until the second week. So when my OCD Buddy and I consulted the Calendar, to see if there was anything already scheduled on or around my ‘beloved’s’ preferred dates, I encountered a small, although not insurmountable, issue. Before we can actually go ahead and pre-book our 10 day vacation, it just happens to coincide with the same period that we have to have our mandatory vehicle test inspection. It is a little different over here in Spain, to what it is in the UK, because the mandatory testing over here, for cars less than 10 years old, has to be done every two years and not annually as in the UK, our’s is now due this September, with the test itself having to be conducted at an Official Spanish Government Testing Station (ITV Station) and this test can only be pre-booked up to one month before the official due date, although the test itself can be conducted at anytime within that one month period. Now that in itself should not be a problem but, if there is an issue and the vehicle doesn’t pass, for whatever reason, then you have a certain time period to get the issue(s) resolved and the vehicle booked in for a re-test, subject of course to appointment availability. So, as we cannot pre-book our vehicle test before the end of August, we do not want to risk pre-booking flights or accommodations before we have a confirmed vehicle test date and, ideally, if we are able to get an appointment date closer to our actual ‘due date’ then we can go on holiday before having the car tested, if the holiday accommodation dates are still available that is 🤷‍♂️ So there will be more news to come on those particular aspects in a future ramble, for now though, all I can tell you is that our ‘proposed’ holiday location will be to somewhere that neither of us have ever visited before 🤗 I know, the suspense of waiting to discover where we have selected to go will be killing you, but just remember, ‘Patience is a virtue’. I will leave you with a hint, the location comprises Sun, Sand, Sea and Swimming Pools, a lot like a ‘Busman’s Holiday’ for us then 🤭 but no making of beds, supermarket shopping, frequent trips to fruiterias, preparing or cooking of meals, washing and drying of pots, so yes, I guess it will be more of a holiday for Shazza, as she tells me that I am on a 365 day a year holiday already 😂

Now for those eagle-eyed readers amongst you, you may well have recognised that the photograph, at the top of this ramble, is of course of the place just down the road from us that we call ‘The Rock’ (Gibraltar), which itself has been the focus of numerous local and International media publications very recently. Now for those that do not know, Gibraltar has been part of the British Empire since the early 1700’s, but ever since then, the Spanish have demanded that we return this very strategic outcrop of rock, located between the Mediterranean Sea and the Atlantic Ocean, back to them. So, why is a former Spanish land mass a British Territory ? I guess that at this point it would be beneficial if I gave just a very brief history of how that came about, but believe me when I say that the historical aspect, as provided by ‘Mr Google’, will be very brief 😁

Now, let’s jump forward another 23 year’s to the current day, 2025, and after a ‘Secret’ meeting between the British, Gibraltarian and Spanish Government’s and of course other EU Officials, who have their own personal interests in the matter, the following headlines were released to the local and International media’s.

Now whilst the current UK Government are at pains to reassure the British and Gibraltarian public that the Island has ‘Not Lost’ any of it’s British sovereignty, which of course is a ‘Lie’ as the Spanish it appears will now have the power to vito Applications and Visas for all persons wanting to take residency on the British Territory and there will no longer be any formal ‘Land Border’ at the ‘Frontier’, once the agreement is ratified later this Autumn, when only a joint Gibraltarian and Spanish Border Control will exist at both the Airport and Sea Port. Gibraltar will then ‘Officially’ become yet another piece of land in the ever increasing list of ‘Schengen Zone’ Countries. Just in case some people reading this news in the media themselves may have missed it, it will also no longer be the ‘Tax Free’ haven that it currently is, as it has also been agreed that, once the agreement is ratified, there will be an immediate increase of 15% Tax on ‘some’ goods and services.

So this is how I interpret this news and see it for what it really is, and not what the current UK Government are trying to sell it as, for like all our UK Politicians, they have a really bad habit of not being ‘Transparant’ in either what they are doing, or what they are telling the British Public that they are actually doing. So the reality is that after 300 years of owning this highly strategic little Country, they have now, contrary to what they have been saying, actually ‘gifted’ Gibraltar back, not only to Spain but the EU as a whole. What was once a British ‘Schengen Free’ Travel area will, once the agreement has been ratified, become yet another part of the continually expanding “Schengen Zone’ of Countries.

Now I do have to say that this ‘change of status’ with Gibraltar, does not actually have any real impact on Shazza or myself, not whilst we are residents here in Spain, although it may in fact have a minor advantage. We do not tend to travel the relatively short distance (30 minute drive) to visit Gibraltar, it is one of those places that in our opinion, once you have seen the touristy stuff and strolled through the shopping areas once, then there is no reason to go back there, unless of course we were to ever decide to use the small Airport to return to the UK, which is unlikely due to the limited number of UK airports that it services. Although, I am not intending to disrespect the Island, for on the occasions when we have visited Gibraltar, yes we enjoyed the opportunity of seeing the tourist sights, going in to shop at the large ‘Morrisons’ supermarket and fill up the car, or Motorhome, with much cheaper fuel. However, although Gibraltar is right on our door step, we have not actually set foot on this British Territory in at least the last four or five year’s. Prior to that we only visited in our capacity of personal tour guides, when we had visitor’s staying with us who wanted to go there, albeit primarily for their ‘Tax Free’ tobacco, alcohol and other products.

With its current status, as a British Territory within a non-Schengen Zone, this does actually create a bit of a disadvantage for us, should we ever feel the need to want to go there as, under our ‘current’ Residency Permit Conditions, we are only permitted to leave Spain for a specific number of months, within the first five year’s of our current residency period. So that means that every time that we do cross the Frontier into Gibraltar we are classed as leaving Spain and, as such, we would have to have our Passports stamped, as ‘exiting’ Spain and then we would need to get them stamped again, when we ‘re-entered’, even if that were only to be for a couple of hours on each trip, and of course, on every occasion we were to do that, well that knocks off days from our overall limited personal travel time periods elsewhere, days that we may prefer to use to go elsewhere outside of the Spanish borders. Additionally, under the current EU regulations, we are not permitted to bring back across the border any Meat or Dairy products, or produce containing any traces of such products 🤷‍♂️ Not that any of that is actually a big problem for us, just really another administrative and beaurocratic irritation and, with our ‘Plant Based’ dietary regime, restrictions on food products are not an issue for us either. But, here is the ‘positive’ side of what will become ‘Gibraltar’s new status’, when the agreement has been ratified of course, when Gibraltar will then have no land border with Spain and will become part of the ‘Schengen Zone’, so, no need to carry our passports, just our Spanish Identity Cards, which legally we have to carry on us at all times anyway, no border controls, none of our limited travel days used up and, if we wanted, no limitations or restrictions on Meat or Dairy items. So as you may imagine, we are not getting overly excited at this news, as realistically it has no, or very little, real impact on ourselves, although, it may have a much larger and important impact for other’s, on both sides of the Schengen divide 🙄

For most British people and other’s from non-EU Countries (Third Countries as they are referred to), who only use Gibraltar as a Port of arrival and departure and who continue on into Spain for short holiday’s or business trips, less than 90 days, then again it isn’t really going to change anything as Travel Documents will be stamped at either the Sea, or Air Ports upon arrival and departure, not at what used to be the former land border. For those arriving by road (Motorhomes, Campervans etc.) who usually come to Gibraltar as an opportunity to perhaps stop the ‘Schengen Clock’ from ticking for a short period, thereby giving them a little extra time within Spain, or Europe’s other Schengen Zones, this will no longer be the case as even time spent on Gibraltar will now be part of the 90 days travel allowance 🤷‍♂️ But I guess that the biggest impact will be on those who perhaps own ‘second homes’ on Gibraltar where, currently, they can spend extended, and unrestricted, periods of time within Gibraltar and from there use their Schengen days to venture into Spain, before returning to Gibraltar and thereby stopping the ticking ‘Schengen Clock’. However, once this agreement has been ratified and provided they are not either Gibraltarian or Spanish Citizens, these kinds of opportunities will very soon no longer be available to them 🤷‍♂️

Now I only mention this new Agreement because it is something that is happening very close to where we currently live, albeit with very little impact on us, either way. Some may say that this has absolutely nothing to do with ‘Brexshit’, but, being the cynic that I am, I asked myself the question, ‘Why would this UK Government basically ‘gift’ Gibraltar back to the Spanish, when it has defended against doing so for circa 300 year’s 🤔’ And ‘Why would it, in doing so, allow the EU to enlarge their land grab and make Gibraltar yet another Schengen Zone Country, in detriment to the British people ?’ It couldn’t possibly have anything to do with a certain Keir Starmer trying to gain favour with the EU, in order for him to be granted concessions from them, in his attempt to align the UK ‘more closely’ with the EU when, in 2016, 52% of the British Public voted that they didn’t want to be aligned, in any way, shape or form, to the EU 🤔 Surely, instead of treating the British Public as if they all lacked any intelligence and realise that they can actually see through this deceit, he should just come out and admit, ‘Brexshit was a catastrophic mistake, economically and otherwise, and that he intends to apply to re-join the EU’, it is after all what he is trying to do via the ‘back door’ 🤷‍♂️ But, you know, sticking with my personal philosophy of, ‘If I do not not have the power to control or influence such things’, I will now rapidly move on to much more less contentious issues.

Our walks are no longer taken on a daily basis, more an ‘as and when’ type of scenario, due to both the heat, and the humidity, I mean I could just say that we are becoming more and more lethargic, but let me honest, we cannot get any more lethargic than what we already have been over the last few weeks. So yes, as you may already have assumed from that, our exercise sessions now come primarily in two forms, either the short two-minute walk to the swimming pool with two or three pool sessions, if we can be bothered 🙄 or the much better, and less strenuous, exercise activity which consists of walking to the fridge to get a cold beer 🤭 It must be hot here, as we were speaking to one of our Spanish neighbours the other day and they said that they were looking forward to their upcoming campervan holiday, up into Northern Spain, where it was much cooler, so if it is too hot down here for the Spanish, what does that actually tell you 🥵 But to be perfectly honest with you, I don’t actually think that it is all that bad 🤷‍♂️ I mean I am the one that doesn’t generally like it any hotter than 25 degrees(c) during the day, but that is the temperature in the middle of the night here at the moment and, it is only going to get hotter, however, by adopting our Summer schedule of movements I actually find it quite bearable, although the generally sun-loving, solar basting Shazza now tends to make me share the shade of ‘my’ sun umbrella with her down at the pool ☹️

It isn’t that we have let ourselves become totally housebound, there are still the necessary weekly, or thereabouts, shopping trips when we do also take the opportunity to visit one or other of our favourite Cafes, well it would be rude not to. We do go out for Dinner, although that is still only once a week at the moment, whilst we are still on our attempted weight loss regime, which I have to confess is not going as well as we both would like it too. It’s not that we are straying off our dietary regime or are eating any unhealthier, or even drinking more alcohol, nope, we have stuck to those regimes for the last five weeks quite rigidly, and even with the additional exercise, combining walks with swimming sessions, but we both just do not seem to be shifting anymore of what we consider excess weight, one week we will have lost maybe 0.2kg, but then the following week we put it back on once again so there appears to be no rhyme or reason for it 🤷‍♂️ I of course blame it on the bathroom scales, but Shazza blames me, for obviously being too heavy and breaking the bathroom scales in the first place, the cheeky bugger 😲

As you will know, from some previous recent rambles, the Summer Fiesta season has started, throughout the whole of Spain not just here, although different Regions, Provinces and even localised Municipalities have their own individual one’s along with the more traditional National events. One event that has taken off Internationally is ‘Gay Pride’, and even our own Municipality of Manilva now holds an annual event.

We did not attend this event, but not for any Anti-Gay reasons, probably just because we couldn’t be bothered but, by all local and social media accounts, it was another very successful and fun weekend with lots of people attending, of all persuasions, and families too. There were marching bands, music, dancing, entertainment, food and drink. So just like with many other different cultures, religions, ethnicity, sexual persuasion etc. the key considerations here are the words ‘Tolerance’ and ‘Acceptance’, as I have probably said many times before in these rambles, if only the world could try to adopt more of these two behaviours then wouldn’t our planet be a much happier place to live 🤷‍♂️ Then of course, that was followed by the first really big Summer event……….

We tend to go out for Dinner mainly on a Saturday evening, because the holiday ambience is much better, although in reality that really interprets as the ‘People Watching’ opportunities are far better 🤭 The only variation to our current routine is when a particular event that we want to attend dictates. Probably one of the main Summer events, ‘Noche de San Juan’ is always held on the 23rd June, irrespective of what day that particular date falls on. This year it fell on a Monday and is marked by, in the days building up to it, the erection of a large structure on the beach which, at midnight, on the 23rd, is set alight and fireworks are sent up into the night sky. This event starts in the early part of the evening, with loads of ‘Pop up Bars’ supplementing the vast number of existing Chiringuitos and Cafe/Bars, there are street performers, fairground attractions, various musical performers etc. etc. and, unless you pre-booked months in advance, forget about getting a table in any eatery along or near the seafront promenade in the town, most attendees take their own beach chairs, cool boxes and drinks and stake a place on the beach to watch the massive party unfold, and there they remain until the small hours of the morning. Suffice to say, the following day is always a ‘Public Holiday’. Over the last two year’s the theme of the giant display, the one that gets set alight at midnight, was all connected to ‘Fairy Tails’, but this year it was to do with ‘Arts and Culture’, and as I had trouble identifying many of the whimsical figures, I guess they all had a ‘Spanish’ association, although in truth, we didn’t really have a clue 🤷‍♂️ Our only observation was that this year’s structure didn’t appear to be as elaborate or as colourful as the previous two year’s.

Prior to coming to live here permanently, during our more nomadic lifestyle in the van, and on our ninety-day ‘Schengen Shuffle’ visits, our timing for these events didn’t quite align, either us having to leave just before the San Juan Fiesta, or arriving just after it 🤷‍♂️ However, we had arrived to commence our first year of residency on 13th June 2023, just 10 days before the Fiesta, so we had pre-booked a seafront restaurant and had stayed until after the beach structure had been set alight, before walking back home in the early hours, in the heat and humidity. For the 2024 event we just took pot luck at where we would eat, but again we remained until after the bonfire was lit and the fireworks lit up the night sky, mingling in the somewhat heaving masses of bodies, placing us way out of our comfort zones, but we were still new residents here and we wanted to once again feel a part of this lively festive communal event. However, now in our third year of being residents here, we didn’t feel the need, or have any desire, to stay out that late or witness the traditional bonfire celebrations, but we still wanted to enjoy the build up and the carnival atmosphere. We went out at 7:30pm and stopped at the Marina first, to have Dinner, before then walking into Sabinillas to enjoy the atmosphere, although it was busier than normal along the whole length of the seafront promenade, but not the crowds that there would be much later that night, it was still early in the proceedings and we felt quite comfortable. We watched as people started to claim their areas of beachfront, the closer to the beach structure you got, the less available space there would be, so many families and even couples opted to settle a little further away. There were early diners in some of the restaurants but many tables in the majority of them were still empty, although with the ‘Reserved’ signs upon them. Normal dining hours for the Spanish do not commence until 10pm and once the table has been booked it is theirs for the duration of the evening. Youngsters were playing on the playground equipments and some had paid for the privilege of using the inflatable bouncy equipment located at both ends of the promenade, amongst which their were popcorn stands, burger stalls, ice cream vendors, well the full Monty really, and when the party finally got started, at around 11pm then, on the large stage there was the disco music and live bands interchanging with their performances throughout the night, and on well into the wee small hours. On this occasion we didn’t stay for the bonfire, or the fireworks, although we could hear them as we stood on our balcony once at home, or at least I could, Shazza having retired to her ‘boudoir’ almost as soon as we had returned home but, with all the windows open, I am certain she must have heard them too.

After the Public Holiday, the day after the San Juan fiesta, the remainder of that week returned to normal, the beaches were busier now as the Spanish schools had broken up for their long twelve week Summer holiday period, and they just added to the large number of other domestic Spanish and foreign tourists, but generally, for us at least, it was now a week of just normality, at least until the weekend when the next local event was scheduled to take place down on another stretch of the beach, this time a bit closer to the Marina, the ‘Manilva SUP Race’. It is more of a fun event with participants from all age groups and genders, young children, teenager’s and adult sized kids, some a little more competitive than other’s 😂 I had enquired about registering to enter with ‘Kevin the Kayak’, well it was inflatable and turned upside down it looked like a SUP Board, but I was told that that would have resulted in immediate disqualification 🤷‍♂️ Although I was actually quite relieved, for if they had said that it had been okay I may have had to really register and taken part, so as to save face, when in reality my question had been more a ‘tongue in cheek’ comment, like a joke but very nearly not that funny, for me at least 😲

I have to say that most events held here are all inclusive, from the youngest age groups right up to the much more senior, and yes even more senior in age than us 🤭 The Spanish enjoy any excuse to have a party, and with wine, beer and spirits always in constant supply, and demand, there are never any problems here with loutish behaviour, or crime, or Anti this or that demonstrations, (Unless of course you happen to be in Mallorca, Ibiza, Tenerife, Madrid, Malaga or Barcelona 🤭).

I know I must sound like a broken record at times but surely, what we continue to experience here, in our little corner of Spain, well, ‘This Is How Life Should Be’ everywhere, shouldn’t it ? Everyone, just enjoying life together, getting on with each other, irrespective of the colour of your skin, the language you speak or even your sexual orientation, just accepting each other for who you are, smiling, laughing having fun together as one big community of people. Of course I know that it isn’t just here in this part of Spain where this is experienced, and yes I guess it could be a case of us having a selective memory, but we both find it hard to remember anywhere in the UK where we have lived, and we have lived in a lot of places, from The North of Scotland to the South of England, where we have not witnessed a similar sort of easy going lifestyle to the one we have here. We also remember from our days of being Campsite Wardens the number of complaints that we had to deal with from those on holiday, and on an almost daily basis in the height of the Summer season, someone had encroached on to their pitch, other people’s kids were running around their vans, smoke from neighbour’s barbecues was coming into their awnings, the grass was too long, but if you cut it during the day around their pitch it disturbed them, the water in the showers was too hot, or not warm enough, dogs were barking all the time, I can tell you without any exaggeration, the list of complaints were absolutely endless 🤷‍♂️ They certainly wouldn’t enjoy life over here then where dogs bark day and night, or living in community accommodations where, with the heat of the night people enjoy sitting out in social groups until late, or windows are open and you can hear the sounds of neighbours across the street, saucepans being used in the kitchens after 10pm at night, or where you can hear one sided telephone conversations and where, on the beach, you can be so close to your neighbour’s that they share the shade of your sun umbrella, and your sun tan lotion 😂

So, on that note, best Shazza and I get ourselves down to our communal swimming pool, before the ‘Little Darlings’ arrive with their oversized inflatables, and excited screams, and ruin our swimming sessions and period of tranquility, what was I just saying about ‘Tolerance’ and ‘Acceptance’, it reminds me of my parents when they used to say “Do as I say and not as I do” 😂😂

Until the next time……………..

Hasta Luego mi Amigos, La Vida Es Buena